Leave it to Bob Schieffer ’59 and his retro alternative country band Honky Tonk Confidential to bring the house — er, tent — down at the April kickoff of The Campaign for TCU. The speak-song “Fort Worth-Dallas,” which Schieffer wrote, concluded a night of serious revelry.

Fort Worth-Dallas

Fort Worth’s where the West Begins:
Cowboys, boots and fringed buckskins.
But we know without a doubt
Dallas is where the East peters out.

Dallas has its bidnessmen,
Plenty of fashions, latest trends.
But it’s short on cattle with too much hat.
Still the D comes first, what’s fair about that?

CHORUS: Dallas, Dallas, yeah we love ya.
But why’s that airport DFW?
Move that D, shift that letter.
Fort Worth-Dallas is so much better!

Fort Worth riders drove the steer.
The Chisholm Trail really had no peer.
We hate to raise ol’ Dallas’ wrath,
But the Shawnee Trail was just a path.

CHORUS: Dallas, Dallas, yeah we love ya.
But why’s that airport DFW?
Move that D, shift that letter.
Fort Worth-Dallas is so much better!

Living large and thinking big,
Dallas, we don’t give a fig.
The only critters you can herd in a pen
Are sleazy lawyers and insurance men.

CHORUS: Dallas, Dallas, yeah we love ya.
But why’s that airport DFW?
Move that D, shift that letter.
Fort Worth-Dallas is so much better!

Dallas-Fort Worth makes us irate,
Some even want to un-hyphenate.
So we say with just a hint of malice
Not Dallas-Fort Worth, it’s Fort Worth-Dallas.

CHORUS: Dallas, Dallas, yeah we love ya.
But why’s that airport DFW?
Move that D, shift that letter.
Fort Worth-Dallas is so much better!

TCU can get it right.
If it comes to that, yeah, we’ll fight
In books and maps and conversation.
Let the word go forth throughout the nation.

CHORUS: Dallas, Dallas, yeah we love ya.
But why’s that airport DFW?
Move that D, shift that letter.
Fort Worth-Dallas is so much better!

Fair is fair we bear no malice.
But get the order right – say Fort Worth-Dallas.
Move that D, shift that letter.
Not Dallas-Fort Worth, it’s Fort Worth-Dallas.
From now on, it’s Fort Worth-Dallas.

CHORUS: Dallas, Dallas, yeah we love ya.
But why’s that airport DFW?
Move that D, shift that letter.
Fort Worth-Dallas is so much better!